Eld Chew Chong Kiat

Beware of Talebearers – Proverbs 26:20-28

Introduction

Who is a talebearer? He is one who backbites or spreads gossip by whispering or murmuring something slanderous about a person, causing hurt to the person, or the fellowship and church, or other organisations.

Talebearing is common, but it is a serious sin. Every Christian must avoid this sin and not be a partaker of such a sin by giving ear to the talebearer. To listen to him is to encourage him to continue in sin.

I.    The Start and Perpetuation of Strife (v20-21)

Verses 21 and 20 deal with the start and perpetuation of strife. The analogy of wood and coal is clear.

a)   v20 – This is an emblematic parallelism teaching the importance of not perpetuating the sin of tale-bearing. Without wood, the fire burns itself out. You need to add wood to keep the fire burning. The talebearer is like the wood and strife the fire. So, where there is no talebearer, the strife will come to an end, even if it has started. It is impossible to totally eradicate the “fire”, for sinful men will quarrel. This is also true of two Christians because they are not perfect. They will inevitably at some point hurt each other, intentionally or not. The quarrel can be reconciled quickly if they apologise to each other with the more spiritual Christian taking the lead. However, when the talebearer enters into the picture the quarrel will spread like wild fire. The talebearer will tell the issues of the two Christians to others who are not even involved. The issues will spread and a trivial matter between two Christians turns into a huge matter involving others.

Christians have to stop this serious sin from spreading and destroying relationships. The recommended way is to get rid of the sin of talebearing. The talebearer has to be told to stop immediately and apologise to the ones he has hurt, failing which, he may have to be cut off from all Christian fellowship. The ultimate chastisement is church discipline. The leaders will warn the church about these talebearers so that the church will not give heed to what they say. By listening to them we will be encouraging them and we’ll become partakers of their sin. We have to stop the talebearer in his sin. The absence of talebearing is the end of strife.

b)   But how do we prevent the start of strife? Verse 21 uses coals and wood to represent a contentious man, and burning coals and fire to represent strife (emblematic parallelism). Without adding wood to fire or without adding coals to burning coals, no fire can be started. Likewise, without a contentious man strife will not be started. The word “contentious” has the same root word as the word “strive”, i.e. a contentious man is a strive-causing man. He is a brawler, a quarrelsome person, one who is known to sow discord. He is worse than a talebearer. The talebearer tells others of an issue that has already begun. But a contentious person starts the issue when there was no issue in the first place. One of the ways is that he becomes a talebearer by spreading tales about others. He whispers in the ears of others, by murmuring or through an outburst of harsh words and false accusations. By so doing, he sows disunity in the church and hurts the fellowship believers have in Christ Jesus. Get rid of this person from your life or stay away from such people and your life will be more peaceful. You will commit fewer sins and hurt fewer people as well. These people destroy relationships. Friends can become enemies because of their foul mouths and caustic disposition. Members have lost confidence in their own leaders whom they once trusted because of these quarrelsome individuals. They creep into churches to ruin and destroy relationships. The worst consequence is that they destroy relationships between a believer and his God by attacking the Bible, causing them to stop believing and trusting in their perfect God.

II.   The Effects of Talebearing (v22)

Verse 22 (c.f. 18:8) tells us the deep hurt caused by talebearers. God uses synthetic parallelism in verse 22 to emphasise His point. It is a serious transgression in the body of Jesus Christ, for every member in the body is purchased by the life and blood of the Lord Jesus Christ. The wounds caused by talebearing are very deep – deeper than wounding an arm or a foot which can be easily treated with medicine. But how do you heal a wounded heart when a person once esteemed a believer better than himself but now he despises him because of the talebearer who told lies and spread falsehood? The hurt and pain “go down into the innermost parts of the belly” (v22). It cuts to the core of the soul. You will comprehend better when you experience it personally. The consequences are that it stumbles and offends; some leave the church and some leave the faith; others let it simmer and they stop talking to one another, and Satan takes advantage of the occasion to cause more disunity. Beware of the sin of talebearing. If you have been hurt by such a sin, the right thing to do is to forgive and not to hold it against the person whom the talebearer has destroyed, and be reconciled to him. “Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother.” (Mt 18:15) How can you worship God if you let the anger simmer in your heart? Leaving the church does not solve the problem. Every believer needs to forgive as God has forgiven him in Christ This means that he forgives for Christ’s sake.  “And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses. But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses.” (Mr 11:25-26)

Beware of the sin of talebearing. You do not love your neighbour when you commit such sins. Don’t make excuses that what you say is true and are facts and you are not lying. You are not being true to the faith that you profess as a disciple of the Lord Jesus Christ who is known by agape love. You must stop this sin – in yourself and in others. Pr 16:28 “A froward man soweth strife: and a whisperer separateth chief friends.”

III.  The Deceitfulness of the Sin of Talebearing (v23-26a)

a)  Verse 23 tells us its disguise. “Burning lips and a wicked heart are like a potsherd covered with silver dross.” (v23 emblematic parallelism) Potsherds are pieces of a broken earthen pot. Talebearing, described here as burning lips coupled with wicked hearts, is like these worthless potteries that is covered with silver dross to give a shine. Silver dross is the by-product in silver refining, rejected and useless. So, wicked men may speak smooth and nice words with great sincerity but they are not worth anything. The way it is said hides its worthlessness like the useless broken pottery covered with silver dross to make it look expensive. So, a potsherd covered with silver drossis a picture of an earnest man burning with zeal and eagerness to share something with you, hiding his wicked intention and wicked heart. He is a slick, two-faced, flattering hypocrite who speaks as if he is well-intentioned, but he is not. He has an axe to grind or he may be purely mischievous or he enjoys the attention as one who seems to know all things. “Burning lips and a wicked heart are like a potsherd covered with silver dross.” (v23) Such is the deceitfulness and hypocrisy of the sin of talebearing.

b)  Verse 24-25 – “He that hateth dissembleth with his lips, and layeth up deceit within him.” (v24) This is a parallel verse to v23. With his lips, he disguises his evil & deceitful heart. He speaks fair but believe him not. Be wise and be instructed, otherwise you will fall prey to him. “When he speaketh fair, believe him not: for there are seven abominations in his heart.” (v25) His heart is completely evil - so evil that the perfect seven is used to describe it. He is smooth in his words, he flatters, and shows kindness and favour to you because he wants you to hear and believe him. He may say it in a way that expresses concern and affection or use a mournful and pitiful tone or show that he is very humble and submissive. Beware! Do not let your guard down, do not believe without first verifying what he says. “Whose hatred is covered by deceit” (v26a). He is good at hiding his hatred for the one he bears the tales of. This is the deceit of talebearing. He deceives you into believing that he means well so that you will believe what he says.

c)  What can you do? Ask him why he tells you those details. Is it necessary for you to know those details? What good is it to you to know them? Is he trying to warn you so that you will be more careful in relating to the person being mentioned? Is the talebearer making fair and righteous comments?

IV.  The Judgement against such sins (v26b-28)

a)  Talebearers should be exposed to the whole congregation (v26b) if they refuse to be corrected and after being warned by the leaders to stop. The effect of his sin is felt by the congregation and they will concur when they see the damage done by such malicious acts.

b)  Talebearers seek the downfall of those they slander and justly they ought to suffer the like retribution. “Whoso diggeth a pit shall fall therein: and he that rolleth a stone, it will return upon him.” (v27)They should be disciplined by the church, and God will return it on their heads if the church fails. If the church does discipline, these talebearers who sin can be restored if they repent. Peace and unity in the church will be strengthened.

c)  The reason why talebearers should be judged is because they mask their hatred with “love” and a soft tongue. They are deceptive. “A lying tongue hateth those that are afflicted by it; and a flattering mouth worketh ruin.” If they are not stopped, they will bring much ruination and afflictions on those they hurt.

Conclusion

Talebearing is not a small matter. God is displeased by such a sin because it affects the church. We need to deal with this sin and prevent it from spreading. Those involved must stop, or they will be disciplined for the sanctification of the church and the glory of God.